Citation: TheLoveableStoner. "Impossible to Prepare Myself: An Experience with Mushrooms (exp96241)". Erowid.org. Jul 12, 2018. erowid.org/exp/96241
Before I share my experience, I’d like to state that even though this may have been considered a bad trip, what I experienced did not affect my willingness to experiment with other, more potent substances. So, let’s begin.
When I first got my hands on these shrooms I was quite naïve as to what effect they had on the mind and body. I spoke to a friend about what I would experience, but I later found out nothing anyone would tell me could truly prepare me for a trip. He told me the standard dose was an eighth (3.5 grams), but I wasn’t really willing to try that much, so I went with 2.5.
As for preparation, I was told to drink them with orange juice, and to make sure to smoke beforehand and during the trip. With that in mind, I decided to eat them at around 10 pm and spend the night in my basement. (Bad idea). I smoked half a bowl or so, and ate the shrooms with a glass of orange juice as I had been instructed. I had heard stories about how awful they tasted, but to me it was hardly that bad. (I also enjoy the taste and smell of DMT so I accept that I’m a bit odd when it comes to that kind of thing).
After around 45 minutes I decided to head downstairs, as I figured they would be kicking in pretty soon. I sat down on the large and comfortable couch in my basement with the lights dimmed and turned on my iPad. I knew very well that the last thing I would want to happen is to be bored, so I called up a couple of friends who were skype-ing while playing some game, and sort of zoned out.
Before I started seeing anything, I began feeling these awesome surges of happiness through my body that literally made me burst out laughing. That’s when I started to notice the painting of a sailboat on my wall begin to gently move, as if it were actually sailing. The waves looked like they were moving, and I just stared, completely entranced. The wall around the painting began to adapt the movements of the waves in the painting and after a while a good portion of the wall was moving with one graceful rhythm.
I started to feel less and less in control of my body, and after a while of staring at the wall, I turned my attention back to my iPad. I tried to pick it up but it felt like my hands were rubbery and loose. As I was now extremely clumsy, I accidentally hung up the Skype call, which annoyed me. I kept trying to call them back, but for some reason I couldn’t, and I started to get frustrated.
I decided to start playing some music, and I chose some pretty trippy relaxed dubstep. For those interested, it was the song “Eastern Girls” remixed by Flux Pavilion. I noticed the time one thought would occupy my mind for was much greater than normal. The lyrics of the song started enmeshing themselves with my thoughts, which confused me like crazy. “All the eastern girls passing by…” kept randomly intruding my thoughts making me feel insane. At that point I think I went a little crazy. I called up a friend of mine on and started warning him about “the worms”.
After a while I noticed I had to go to the bathroom so I left my iPad and started trying to navigate my dark basement. Once I started walking I really focused on how I felt.
Once I started walking I really focused on how I felt.
The only way I can really describe what it felt like to walk is that moment when you’re very drunk and about to collapse into a bathroom to throw up. I felt like I didn’t have much control over my body, but nevertheless I was able to find and go to the bathroom. Actually going to the bathroom felt really weird, but I got through it.
This is when I made the key mistake that turned my trip around. I looked into the mirror, and for some reason seeing myself scared me. I looked really sick, and I started thinking I looked disgusting. At that point my face started to morph and melt as if I were aging rapidly. For whatever reason I kept staring, as liver spots formed on my face, and it began to lose color. My hairline moved back, and at that point I tore my eyes away from the mirror and closed them. At that point I just collapsed on the bathroom floor, and moved to the corner. I started shaking my head, thinking I had just ruined my life, and I promised myself I would never do any drugs again. I told myself I would confess to my parents and check myself into rehab. Then everything sort of went black.
I woke up still on the bathroom floor, my shirt soaked with sweat and I didn’t want to stand up. I had no control over my thoughts; they just randomly switched from topic to topic. I came to the realization that all life was utterly insignificant, and nothing I did mattered. I was able to visualize time itself, which I could see as sort of a flowing wave. It took me a long time to stand up, and when I did, I looked in the mirror again. This time, my face looked normal, except for the fact that I was covered in sweat. I stared for a few more seconds, and features on my face began twitching and changing. My face slowly began to droop and melt, but I had the sense to look away before I scared myself to death. I sat on the bathroom counter top, having decided I would just wait out the rest of my time. I got my phone out and checked the time. It was 4 am, so I figured the shrooms would be wearing off.
I still had no control of my thoughts, and every once and a while they would just randomly dip into lyrics of the song I had been listening to: “Been walking around with my eyes closed, keeping away from your windows, fearful eviction horizons, but you took my life in your hands”. The words would echo through my head, making me think I was insane. Time would pass extremely slowly, but this was something I was ready for, based on what my experienced friend had told me.
After sitting there for two hours, I decided to go up to my room and look at the sunrise. I fell asleep pretty quickly.
Even though I had a pretty rough time, I woke up feeling fantastic. All in all it was a pretty weird experience, but I suppose it could have been worse. Since this trip I have tried acid, DMT, and shrooms a few more times. It had no obvious effect on my life.
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