Citation: Thomas. "I Saw Jesus Christ and Talked With Dead: An Experience with Mushrooms, Cannabis (exp9711)". Erowid.org. Aug 9, 2004. erowid.org/exp/9711
Hello, i'll try to explain my experience as it was REALLY intense and strange. The best trip i've ever had in my life, and i can say that it changed my prospectives about life after death, religion and spirituality.
This summer i went to Amsterdam, you know, it's like a holy pilgrimage for potheads. Before that, i've never ever taken any psychedelic drug, i used to smoke pot or hash and drink some alcoholic drinks. I practice meditation and i'm a deep person, with interests in religion and philosophy. I always used drugs not just to have fun but to see something more than the 'material' reality.
You have to know that this holidays around Europe were going to be a relief for me, as i passed through a black period of depression the year before, and i KNEW exactly that everything i was going to try was going to be good. I'm telling you about this experience as it was my second good trip with mushrooms: it wasn't the first time and so i took a bigger dose (two bags of hawaian mushrooms, dried and funny looking) just to see how deep i could penetrate into my mind, so the mindset was optimal: i wanted to have a nice trip and i think this is VERY important while taking psychedelics (at this time i've tripped on many other psychoactive drugs, and i've seen that you must concentrate to control your trip, to go where you want with your mind).
It was my first time with hawaians, and the 'mushroom guy' at the smartshop told me that they were pretty potent with lots of visuals.
I took them while i was hanging around the city centre of Amsterdam, and i let them come up smoothly and quietly, chewing them bit by bit, drinking water, smoking herb to lower the stomach cramps i got (they had such a bad taste) and smoking all the time until i got back to the camp.
The trip was starting and i felt like many needles were sprouting on my head, i felt dizzy and very peaceful. While going to the camp (with many other friends from my country, speaking my own language, and so i was more comfortable) i felt SO GOOD, i looked to all the neon lights, to all the faces, to all the people: the world never looked so deep and so various. I started to talk about melting-pot society, i started to talk a lot about lots of problems in the modern world, and i was so.. i can't explain that, i felt like i was so compassionate.
This state of mind lasted till i entered my tent. Right now it was night and the time was like never passing, a minute was a sequence of infinite thoughts and feelings, and i wasn't able any more to tell what was the time. I finally found what the trip was about: getting in contact with another reality that lives within us all, within all the living things, all the landscapes and in the objects. While there in the camp the time stopped, we sat around a lamp (in my group of friends just two of us took mushrooms, me and another guy) and i smoked a lot.
Even if the time wasn't flowing anymore, after the illumination(about this 'other plane' i wrote above) it felt so good to talk with the others, as i was able to see what they didn't see: the energy around their bodies, the thoughts that lie behind every single spoken word. I felt like i had a strong empathy, knowing-before-it-happens the thoughts of the people around me (this was exceptionally true with the other guy who was tripping, like we were the 'gatekeepers' of those two realms of reality, with the ability to know exactly the essence of what it seems the world is).
After some hours, everyone was too stoned to stand out of the tent anymore (it was getting chilly), and even if my buddy who took shrooms went out of the camp for a walk, i decided to stay in my own tent all alone, thinking about things.
In my tent i had everything i wanted to have: orange juice, some marijuana, a pipe, water, food. So i felt very 'at home' and i was sure about everything. That night was great.
But then, for a minute, I had a terrible fear about having a bad trip being alone, but i was wrong and i'll tell you why: when i just entered the tent, apart from the fact that i wasn't able anymore to connect my words with the 'non flowing time' (like i repeated 20 times 'goodnight to everyone' in circa 1 minute), i felt like liquid. I entered my sleeping bag as i was a snake made of fluids, and everthing around me was melting with me. The voices coming from outside, the laughs, the people having fun, the people walking, the forest, the sea, everything was inside my little and warm tent. I just felt like moving all the time inside that sleeping bag, and i wasn't able to control my own body. The things around me were me and i was the things around me.
Then the visuals started: i started to see a warm, golden shower coming from my back and melting with this 'liquid ego' i was, and then i entered a big tunnel of light, and then i said to myself that 'i was really entering my own mind'. Then a battle started between this golden tunnel of light, and a somewhat 'dark light' that was trying to merge with the tunnel: for me it was really hard, i'm almost sure that this 'dark part' of my ego was the depression i was trying to definitely defeat. I tried to concentrate with so much mental force to destroy this dark thing, to eliminate it from my view: i saw many spiders (i had a terrible fear of spiders before this experience), but then i materialized a 'hand' with my thoughts and i smashed the spiders' webs around the 'white', the 'good' light of the tunnel.
After this 'enemy' that i'm sure was the depression within me, a daemon inside my mind, i came back to reality: the tunnel ceased to exist, my liquid ego disappeared and i instantly felt more 'physical', i could touch the reality around me and it was pretty strange, like when i came back home from a very long journey all of a sudden.
But things didn't finish like this: in the corner of the tent right in front of me i sa a big, bright white Christ with sunlight all around the long hair and the beard. The face was the one you usually find everywhere, but everything was so 'bright', like it was a ghost or something.
I tell you, i'm not a christian even if my education has been pretty christian catholic.
Then this Christ pointed at me and told me 'YOU', in my own language (Italian), and i felt extremely relaxed and somewhat 'sure', like i finally found what i was looking for.
After this vision, just next to Jesus the face of my dead Grandfather appeared, and he was so beautiful: he was very calm, he had a big smile and said hello to me. He said that everything was alright, and now i was cured. It was so scary and beautiful at the same time, as Jesus disappeared and i was able to communicate with my Grandfather. I didn't use words, it was like he knew exactly what i wanted from him and he answered me everything i wanted to know.
I asked him about me, about my situation, and he told me that he knew everything and that he's with me in every moment. Since that i finally found that life after death exists. It was a life-changing experience, and right now i'm not Christian, i'm still with my own ideas about religion, but i firmly believe in afterlife.
Then a sense of peace endured something like one hour, my grandfather disappeared and i heard my father's voice calling me and asking me if everything was ok. All of a sudden, i felt very warm and fell asleep.
The next morning i felt very energic, i had a very strong will to live, i felt like i passed through death but i was alive and kicking: it felt GREAT, except for one thing.
Since i'm able to remember everything in the details, i remembered of my father's voice after the vision of my dead grandad: i was afraid of having predicted my father's death, so i started to get a little bit paranoid and phoned back home immediatly, but everything was alright and i was another person.
The whole experience lasted something like 8 hours, with the 'good energy' feeling lasting for many and many other days: right now, after two months, i can recall the way i watched reality that night and i can explore some more everytime i relax and start to think.
I hope this -LONG- report will be useful to someone, sorry about my poor english.
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